school is officially over

so now, i have nothing to do. well actually, its the complete opposite. my life during the summer will be packed with just benefits for the future. all this worrying about a better life when i hit my junior and senior year. i thought that when school would be over, i'd be so happy because i wouldn't worry about grades. but now, i have all this free time, to think about whats gonna happen after summer vacation. there's nothing really that i'm doing that involves the present, besides the vacation. the others are just gonna be, oh if i get into a better sports team, volunteer hours for college, swimming so that i might grow taller? what am i gonna do that i would like, for right now? none of all this planning so that my life would be better later on. why can't i just worry about later on, later? because the earlier the better. the earlier you volunteer, the better. the earlier you have some sports the better. i wanna do something that would make me happy right now, not something i'm doing to make me happy years later. but i know i would regret not doing it. maybe i'm just going into this subject a bit too deep, because i am happy doing all these things. but its just draining out all my energy. i always feel tired and after i do something, i would take a four hour nap and when i wake up, i wouldn't want to. this is basically me complaining about not sleeping enough, but i'm still happy doing all these things, its just i want to stop planning everything.