...

ok so i guess the waiting thing didn't really help. probably cussed silently cause i talked/annoyed you again. sigh. story of my life.sorry, i won't bother you again. i was really hoping we could get past this issue, even if my chances were low. i would've rather you yell at me, cuss at me, or say hurtful things to me. cause at least i know we're still talking. but not talking at all, doesn't feel so good or when i wait forever for you to reply, until i realize you arent. i guess thats what you're trying to do you, you probably know not talking is worse for me and that you wouldn't have to be involved in my life anymore. that hurts, to tell the truth.

my whole life has been overruled by my depressing thoughts and i'm slowly sleeping less and less and less and less. i'm down to a little less then six hours a day of sleep time now, and that sucks. i haven't even touched my backpack to start on hw yet and i'm becoming a disaster. i don't know what to do anymore. sure i'll start my hw, then after writing down one sentence i would stop cause....i don't even know what i do to stopor even why i stop. all i know is, i stop. which is also why i'm sleeping so late. i've lost my concentration and all of my aspirations for school. but i don't want it to be this way, i really don't. i guess thats how it is though. no matter how many times i've said it, i'm sorry for hurting you. i really don't know what else i can do for you to forgive me anymore.
i've ran out of directions, and i'm lost. i guess it really will turn out like this, the last thing i wanted.